I think this relates to this lesson’s topic of how tapas, or self-discipline, can sometimes be harmful, and when we cross into that place of harm is where it no longer serves us. Waking up still feeling quite unwell today, I gave myself permission to stay home and truly rest and recover, knowing that I will likely recover more quickly than if I tried to “push through” and go to work. And I haven’t shamed myself once for it (woo!). Sometimes I catch myself doing that negative self-talk, saying things like, “You’re just being lazy,” or “You should at least be doing chores while you are off.” Today, I have been trying to remind myself that resting is not the absence of discipline. Rest is actually the disciplined choice because it is what my body actually needs right now.

I really appreciated the conversation around this topic and how discipline should still be rooted in compassion and grace for yourself. You shouldn’t shame yourself into behaviors just because you feel like you “have to” do something. Similar to what other folks shared in group, I also find myself doing this with my workout routine - shaming myself into a workout, or bombarding my mind with negative self-talk if I miss a workout.

I have historically thought of discipline as forcing myself to do something regardless of how I feel (shoutout hustle culture telling us “no one cares, work harder!”). But I think true discipline is having enough awareness to recognize what I need in the moment and enough commitment to honor that need. Sometimes discipline means still getting my ass to the gym when I would rather sit on the couch. Sometimes it means following through on something that is difficult or uncomfortable. And like today, it means doing absolutely nothing (besides catching up on PYP recorded lessons lol) and allowing myself to recover without rest being something that needs to be earned. The type of self-discipline that recognizes current well-being and needs with compassion and grace is what I have been actively trying to practice recently. You can still be disciplined while recognizing your humanity and changing needs.

If you were unable to join live, please share your reflection as you watch the recording. This week's session began by sharing the series of Guest Lectures available. These lectures are optional, but you are encouraged to watch any or all of them!

This session also explored the final niyama of Ishvara Pranidhana (Surrender) and offered space to co-create a sequence.

Consider sharing your thoughts on the discussion of surrender. Because these breakout workshops were not recorded, please consider taking time to review the copy of the facilitation guide that was shared in the 9/10 Session Agenda email and work through how you might customize a practice to share with those you serve or plan to serve.

This made me think about generational truths within my own family. Like many families, mine has experienced trauma across generations. There have also been expectations, particularly for women, about who they should be, how they should behave, and what kind of life they should live. I think my grandmother and my mother were happy enough in many ways, but there was also conditioning, samskara, that kept everyone within certain roles and expectations.

I see myself as someone who is breaking some of those cycles. At the same time, I can recognize that there have been moments when I have spoken the complete truth in ways that caused harm. Sometimes that came from the fact that I had been harmed myself. I was telling the truth, but truthfulness alone did not necessarily make the way I communicated it helpful. I appreciated Jen's point around "I could tell the complete truth in a way that was harmful," while also thinking about Monica's point that sometimes the better choice might simply be to keep my mouth shut. 

I also really connected with the graphic exploring the different ideas of self. Right now, I feel very connected to the global part of myself. Although I live in Canada, I have been thinking a lot about what is happening politically in the United States and internationally. I really wanted to attend the PYP Trauma-Informed Facilitation Intensive in Brooklyn this weekend. It is something I have thought about a lot and genuinely want to experience, but the current political climate in the U.S. has created enough fear for me that I do not feel able to go right now. I've noticed how much that fear, and what is happening beyond my immediate environment, has been occupying my mind.

My relationship with spirituality has also changed. During another period of my life, even when I was struggling and drinking every day, I was creating art, singing and dancing, and felt much more connected to my spirituality. Right now, living in a shelter, I feel caught in an institutional loop. That environment has been incredibly difficult for me. I frequently advocate for equity-centred, trauma-informed care, but I often feel as though I am encountering systems and interactions that are rigid rather than caring.

My relationships have changed dramatically as well. I have lost many people through everything that has happened over the last few years. That makes Aleyshia's comments about being afraid to move forward and becoming stuck within our own stories especially meaningful to me. I recognize that right now, in many ways, I am still in my story. These circumstances are not something I can simply reflect on from a comfortable distance because I am still living through them. But I also don't want the story to end there.

Returning to the Prison Yoga Project training feels like part of finding my way back to myself. I am committed to completing the work I need to finish by October and graduating. The last little while has been extremely difficult, and there have been times when I have struggled to get out of my own way. Re-engaging with this training reminds me that there is still a path forward and that I can choose how I want to walk it.

What I want now is to increasingly live, speak, and act in ways that are aligned with who I am, while remembering that being truthful and being compassionate do not have to be competing values. Breaking generational patterns is not only about speaking truths that were previously left unspoken. It can also mean learning new ways of speaking those truths, ways that do not recreate the harm I am trying to leave behind.

As I am joining you and this training from South Africa, I won't be attending the live sessions due to time difference, so am watching on my own and posting my reflections here. This module was incredible, and at first I thought 3-hours of watching might be a bit of a task, once I started, I just couldn't stop watching! Here were some things I made notes about, and/or what really stood out to me.

1) Jen's demonstration of how sometimes we are leading as "life is happening" around us, and how to manage that honestly, openly, and with such grace. It was so cool to watch regulation in motion :) 

2) I loved the phrasing around how yoga is a union of mind-body-spirit, but when we've experienced trauma, there has been a rupture somewhere, and yoga can help us to repair or remember who we were before that rupture occurred.

3) As facilitators we are not aiming for perfection, we can be honest when we show up (emotionally). We also demonstrate this in the physical practice when we don't always show our full extent of a pose, as we are not there to perform or for this time to be our own practice space. We are there to serve. 

4) I learned a lot during the discussion about something being named a "safe space" - I am still reflecting on this conversation

5) I really loved the discussion about how we (as facilitators) are guests in their home, their space, and to respect that. This is another way we honour agency. 

6) Alejandro discussed how authenticity is our greatest tool, and when we have the courage to show up just as we are, this is when healing happens (within ourselves and for others)

7) I found the conversation and knowledge around PYP's belief in post-lineage, participant centred and trauma informed facilitation to give me hope. It made me feel happy to know I am now in a space that makes so much sense to me, and that feels like it fits. I wrote down the definition of what this means, and particularly resonated with the part that stated we consider "radical truth-telling about systems of harm". 

8) The practical piece of how wearing the same shoes on cement floors was amazing, and I began to think of other things that relate, such as pillows that may not support, beds, etc. 

Thank you to all for sharing this deep wisdom, and to you Jen and Alejandro for making this such a welcoming and inclusive space!

In the module reflection assignment for this week, I talked a lot about how I have spent most of my life always striving for the “what’s next.” From getting into the “right” college, to landing the “best” internship, to finding the “perfect” job, it just felt like a never ending cycle of needing more and never fully celebrating or being satisfied with the work it took to get there. So contentment feels like a super salient and resonating topic for me.

I feel like contentment is both a practice and an innate knowing or feeling. It is a practice in the sense that I have to consciously slow down to notice and appreciate what is already here. I practice gratitude for the life I have built, the people I have in my life, the experiences I have had, etc. Santosha reminds us that we don’t have to be continuously chasing the next thing, and that we can be grateful for what we currently have in the present and recognize that it is enough. But I also appreciate how it doesn’t equate to not having goals or wanting to be better. Those things can and should still exist simultaneously.

I also think contentment is a knowing or feeling. For me, it feels like a genuine trust that I am exactly where I am supposed to be, even when where I am feels difficult, uncertain, or different from what I imagined. This connects to some of my previous reflections about learning to trust my own inner knowing rather than getting caught in the endless “what ifs” and “maybes” of my mind. Santosha feels like an invitation to trust and find contentment in knowing that I can navigate life without having everything figured out. It’s like true contentment with self.

I started to have a great interest in yoga philosophy. I have been doing yoga quite a long time but it was only asana and breathing. Yes, I had learnt the theory a little bit before but I thought it was kind of boring to me at that time and I was more focused on achieving a good looking posture. Didn't really realize yoga is so much beyond that.

Finding contentment in a discontented world. That sounds like tremendous of practice, dedication and on going discipline which I kind of lack of and I have to admit those are my weakness that I need to work on. Contentment is from the connection to yourself, unwavering trust in self. A lot of individuals have difficulty of trust in self including me. Is it meant to be hard? However listening to affirmation and talking to myself in front of mirror every morning helped me a lot to overcome this self trust issue. For a long time, I let my ego control myself. I still hear my ego telling me whatever it wants to say but the difference now is that I do not let my ego to dictate myself. Today I can observe it and kind of know how to gently separate it from my true self. I found out this practice is not one time practice. This is the practice that I have to do every single day just like we need to injest food and sleep every single day. When I miss this practice several days, I know immediately I am going back to my old self. So our mind needs to be nourished as much as our physical body, definitely.

I enjoyed listening to the story of going to the wood and live there for 27 years. Maybe not 27 years and not completely alone by myself but I would love to live in the wood without the connection to the outside the world for 6 months. That has been always my dream. But at the same time I also try to be contented wherever I am at this moment and feeling gratful of what I have right now because there are happiness everywhere. Everyday not might be happy but there is a happiness in every day if we know how to perceive it.

our organs and each body part are all connected to our mind and nervous system especially the stomach. I knew of this fact but maybe I was not very pay attention to it before. Emotions and stress can direclty affect our gut. That is why we sometimes totally lose our appetite, not even feel it when we are in traumatic situation. This is so interesting to me and it reminds me of Dr. Joe Dispenza, neuroscientist and chiropractor who is recovered his severe spinal injury without surgery but with meditation and mind- body connection practice.  Terminal illness patient gets 3 months life sentence from the doctor and he passes away exactly after 3 months but found out that was false diagnosis and he didn't have any illness. Yes, not often but we hear this kind of story from time to time and it is actually happening. I really enjoy finding out those stories. It is like hearing magic story for me. I get super excited to hear and learn this subject. There must be something out there working invisibly. We just don't see it through our naked eyes just like the oxygen. We don't see it but it exists.

Connecting to our 'gut instinct' in speech and conversation.

(Before You speak)

1. Is it true?

2. Is it necessary?

3. Is it kind?

I probably don't consider these 3 things before I talk but I will try to keep that in my mind from now on. Pause, think and talk.

In our class, 'Pause' is often emphasized and I love it. It is slowly becoming my habit. Amazing tool for check in myself so that I don't go autopilot. 

I try to instill my learning from this yoga class to my teenager daughter in daily life and I am thinking this yoga philosophy should be in our school subject for children. If I knew even a little bit of this beautiful insight when I was a kid, I would have been much more happier girl who can be contented to myself. But I am gratful that I am opening my eyes now and at least I can explain a little bit better to my girl.   

Each guest brings a different lens—rooted in personal practice, social justice, trauma-informed healing, and systemic wisdom. This series is an invitation to expand our understanding of what it means to teach, serve, and hold space—especially in carceral and system-impacted environments.

These additional lectures are optional. You are welcome to watch as many of them as you would like, but these sessions are not required.

🗓️ Guest Lecture Series:

Robert Sturman

Title: To Be Seen: Yoga, Dignity, and the Art of Witnessing in Prisons
Bio: Award-winning photographer known for capturing healing and dignity in prison yoga spaces.

Dr. Jennifer Bourgeois

Title: Cultural Responsibility & Humility in Criminal Justice Work
Bio: Trauma-informed counselor and researcher focused on justice-impacted communities.

Nikki Myers

Title: Healing in the Margins
Bio: Founder of Y12SR, working at the intersections of recovery, justice, and embodied healing.

Nicole Hellthaler

Title: Managing Challenging Behaviors in Trauma-Informed Spaces
Bio: Executive Director of Prison Yoga Project and expert in trauma-informed systems and care.

Sonia Brown-Diaz

Title: Maintaining Facility Relationships & Self-Regulation in a Carceral Setting
Bio: Founder of Yoga on the Inside and Australian PYP Ambassador, focused on ethical service in prisons.

Dr. Haunani Chong Drake

Title: Cultural Stewardship and the Five Elements
Bio: Native Hawaiian scholar integrating Indigenous healing and trauma recovery practices.

Diane Ambrosini

Title: Understanding the Vagus Nerve Through a Yogic Lens
Bio: Yoga therapist and educator specializing in nervous system health and trauma-informed movement.

Hari-Kirtana Das

Title: Exploring the Bhagavad Gita
Bio: Yoga philosophy teacher making classical texts accessible through humor and social ethics.

Bill Brown

Title: Beyond Asana: Integrating Wisdom from Tradition, Science, and Life
Bio: Programs Director of Prison Yoga Project and longtime yoga educator weaving together insights from yoga philosophy, science, and lived experience.

Sachi Doctor

Title: Healing with Ayurveda: A Trauma-Informed Approach to Restoring & Maintaining Balance
Bio: Ayurvedic practitioner and founder of Elemental Alchemy, bridging science and spirit.

Judge Victor Reyes

Title: Authenticity in Service Work
Bio: Retired judge integrating yoga, mindfulness, and justice reform.

Josefin Wikström

Title: Adapting Trauma-Informed Yoga for Mental Health

Additional Session w/Josefin- Facilitator Workshop: Working with Severe Mental Health Challenges in Correctional Settings with Josefin Wikström

Bio: Global leader in trauma-informed yoga in psychiatric and carceral systems.

Kim Peacock

Title: Guiding Incarcerated Youth
Bio: Canadian PYP Ambassador with deep experience teaching yoga to system-impacted youth.

We hope you enjoy the insight in these powerful conversations. All questions, curiosities, and reflections are welcome in this space.
With gratitude,
🌿 Jen & The PYP Training Team