9/7/23 Live Session Recording

I'd like to share "my Orange Julius story".  I believe I was about 4 years old, and I was at my cousin's birthday party.  They were giving out balloons, I pointed to the pink balloon and told my mom and uncle that is the color I wanted.  My cousin's friend or friend's son wanted the pink balloon as well.  It was the only pink one.  My uncle told me Lisa, let him have it.  Which I did.  I think I got a yellow balloon instead.  I remember pondering on why I was not given the color I wanted.  I tried to understand, in my 4-year-old brain, what has transpired. 🧐   I remember thinking that maybe the little boy had some sort of behavioral issues and maybe my uncle perceived that my capacity to deal with getting the color balloon different from the color I wanted may be greater than the other child's capacity.  For whatever reason it may have been, from that day, I began the process of understanding different aspects of human behavior.  I also understood in my mind my uncle may have viewed me as a strong young lady.  I realize now that perhaps this may be the reason that I enjoy the things everyone else does not want.  I seem to make other people's trash my treasure.  I kind of make jokes about it although it is quite serious.  I feel like sometimes I do not deserve certain things like the higher quality better material possessions and maybe even love.  I am working on giving love and receiving love.  I am working on acknowledging my worth simply because I exist.  It is unconditional.

I see that I am content in my life, even when or especially when I have very little.  This does not mean I do not go after what I want/need.  My fiancé told me that even my brother told him something about me before he died, he said "she never needed much".  I agree with that statement.  I have trust in God that everything turns out the ways it is supposed to.  There are many blessings in disguise.

I have come up with a snip of what I would consider offering for the second half of Trauma-Informed sequencing.  For Strength and Mobility - I would offer accessible sun salutations using a chair or wall.  Begin by standing in mountain pose in the middle of the mat. Facing the wall or chair.  Feet hip width distance apart put hands together in front of you and take a deep breath in...and exhale.  Take a deep breath in and raise arms slightly toward your head or if you choose you are invited to raise your arms overhead.  With a tall spine stretch up, if it serves you today, you are invited to look up without straining your neck.  Exhale.  Begin to hinge forward at the hips, place you palms on the wall or chair for supported downward dog.  (2 breaths here) Bending your knees alternately right and left.  Inhale step forward with left foot.  Bring the toes to the front of the wall or chair bending at the knee.  Exhale.  Inhale.  Straighten the arms, lengthen the spine.  Exhale.  Step the left foot back into downward dog on the wall or chair.  Inhale.  Exhale.  Inhale step forward with right foot.  Bring your toes to the front of the wall or chair.  Inhale.  Exhale.  Inhale step forward with the right foot.  Bring your toes to the front of the wall or chair.  Bend at the knees.  Exhale.  Inhale.  Straighten the arms, lengthen the spine.  Exhale.  Step right foot back into downward dog on the wall or chair.  Inhale.  Raise the torso slowly and raise the arms as you feel comfortable.  Exhale.  Arms at the sides. 

For Focus and Concentration - With your chair near you for support inhale bend at your knees slightly and you can hold onto your chair for balance.  Exhale.  Straighten your knees.  Inhale Bend your knees slightly.  Exhale.  Straighten your knees.  Inhale.  Bend your knees slightly a little deeper at your comfort level.  Hold in chair (3 to 5 breaths) Stand up straight and shake it out.  Grab your block.  Place the block on the floor in front of you 2 feet away from the back of your chair next to your left leg.  Stand near the chair back for support if needed.  Place hand on your chair back.  Ground into your feet evenly.  Raise your left leg and slide your block with your foot under your left foot.  Lift your left leg and place your foot on your calf and yours toes on the block for support.  Extend your branches (arms) as you like.  (2 breaths) lower your left foot to the floor and shake it out.  Raise your right leg and slide your block with your foot under your right foot.  Try placing your heal on your calf and your toes on the block for support in tree pose.  Extend your branches.  (Hold 2 breaths).  Lower your right leg to the floor. 

For Integration and Relaxation - Sit comfortably in your chair.  Inhale.  Raise your right leg and place it over your left thigh.  (Hold 3 breaths) while slowly rotating the right ankle.  Lower right leg.  Feel a release as you rotate your torso in circles while seated for a few rounds.  Back to center.  Inhale.  Raise the left leg and place on your right thigh.  Breath in and out naturally for 3 breaths as I invite you to rotate your left ankle.  Lower left leg.  Then I invite you to try holding the chair with both hands.  Inhale and slowly turn your torso towards the right side twisting the torso from the hips and slightly gaze behind you as you feel comfortable, or you may not feel comfortable looking back today so, you can try holding your head in a position that feels most comfortable for you.  Exhale. Completely.  Here, in chair seated twist, take a deep breath in and out.  Release slowly as you come back to center.  Roll the shoulders.  Now I invite you to take a deep breath in and turn toward the left, twisting at the torso from the hips and you can gaze slightly behind you as it feels comfortable.  Exhale. Completely.  Here in chair seated twist take a deep breath in and out, release slowly and come back to center. 🤗 🤗 Now give yourself a great big hug.

@lcoulombe86gmail-com 

Thank you for sharing, Lisa! 

Trust in Self is very alive for me right now and the call towards stepping into the role of a facilitator for this practice of yoga is part of my practice towards trust. Often, the lack of trust I have experienced towards myself has shown up as feeling disconnected from my "voice," and stepping into the role of a facilitator to me feels like a way to share my voice in a way that is humble, connected, and curious. 

Here are some ideas for pt 1 of sequencing. 

Opening - opportunity to acknowledge for being in this space, honor body 

discharge/ release: moving from side to side slowly. opportunity to stay there or move towards isolated shaking of either individual body parts or full body - that can look like shaking one hand, shaking one foot, one finger, full body

option to start slow and increase speed or stay fast depending on what body is calling for in the moment 

moment to notice how body feels 

begin to come back into stillness if that feels ok, moving into arms movements - bringing arms out in front and moving arms up and down 

can lift legs R/L like marching in place with arms or try lifting one leg then other / maybe starting to alternating 

shifting into dynamic warm up: seated cat cow, standing cat cow, or table - option to bring hands to a place that is comfortable, cow, lifting heart, lifting chin, cat, dome through spine, maybe tuck chin X10 for spinal flexion 

bring awareness to breath 

come back to seated, standing, show options for folks who may have been in table to safely stand back up 

Twist head L then R for twists or raise arms and t L then R 

connect back to breath/ option for belly on hand / <3 

moving into centering 

easy seat 

mtn pose - whether seated or standing: offer to bring awareness to connection with feet on ground, offer to place hands in lap, lifted towards sky 

invitation to bend knees slightly 

wide legged forward fold using back of chair for support or folded all the way down 

It is interesting to put shame as a type of opposite to contentment.  I also can identify feelings of unworthiness in my life and see that it is linked to discontent.  Like the story of the orange Julius, which touched on perceived judgments of unworthiness embedded in youth, it is interesting to see how common these feelings are and how they can take on different forms, such as feeling uncomfortable with taking the best thing for yourself or the opposite of feeling unworthy if you don’t have something that is the best or better than everyone else.  I experienced a lot of “stuckness” my first semester in graduate school, as far as difficulty confidently perusing the connections I needed.  I think, much of the discomfort was that I am reaching a certain place that I never thought I would reach in reality and it feels like I don’t belong there.  The closer to my long-term goals I got, the more I began to feel anxious and disoriented.  Dealing with this part of myself and my reactions has been a core challenge for me.  The Orange Julius story reminded me of sometimes I was singled out as unworthy in my own family of origin.  When I was 11 or so, I was left out of Christmas, and it was decided that I out of all the family I did not deserve Christmas presents.  I was also often secluded in my room to do extra homework/academic work while others in my family did family outings.  At least once I was kept up there when family members came into town and visited over several days, and I was left out of the family gatherings down stairs When I got older and after my parents divorced my dad would leave me out of family trips when he would take my brothers and at least once he told me he didn’t want or couldn’t pay for me (even though he made a very good income).  It's nice to return to this idea of being content with oneself and to understand more the elements of trust and gratitude for oneself.  It is nice to practice trusting that my path is right for me even when if feels like it’s too good for me. 

Discharge: energetic release, right/ left brain stimulation, keeping/elevating heart rate & breathing

• Rub hands together  notice how your body is feeling today
• Sway back and forth at the pace that feels right for your body  notice if you are moving quickly or slowly and what your energy level might be.
• Begin to swing your arms back and forth  you might swing them slowly, bringing them only to your hips, or you might swing them higher.
• Keeping your rhythm, begin to lift your legs  notice where in your body you might be carrying energy.
• Bring yourself to stillness.

Warm-Up:  movement of the spine, shift to focused movement, reducing heart rate/breath, more focused movement, slow heart, breathing

• Slowly bend forward, rolling your spine, and you move downward into a ragdoll pose
• After a couple of breaths, when it feels right to you, begin to roll backup to standing slowly
• Give your body a gentle twist, reaching the opposite hand to opposite shoulder and gleut
• Bring your body to stillness, then allow your body to sway as you lift up one heel, then another
• When you are ready, begin to lift your knees.
• Begin to touch your elbows to your knees as they lift toward you.
• Bring your body to stillness and lift your arms upward in a position that feels best for your body.
• Take two breaths and notice how you feel.
• Notice the strength and support provided through your feet.
• Take 2 more breaths, and when you are ready, slowly bring your hands down

Centering:  focus on natural breath, regulation, and self-soothing, setting intention, introducing the theme, reducing heart rate, breath

• Put one hand on your heart and one hand on your belly
• Notice your breath, is it quick or slow
• Follow your breath (10 breaths or so)
• Notice how your body is feeling